LSD Docs/LSD Docs.iso/FILEZ/lsd30.dms/lsd30.adf/lsl1Enhanced.doc.pp/lsl1Enhanced.doc

Text File | 1990-09-07 | 32KB | 836 lines

             Leisure Suit Larry I - Sierra Game Manual

AMIGA Hard Disk Installation Procedure

Please Note: Rename your copies of all game disks to remove the words
"copy of" from the disk name.  If the words `copy of' are not removed
from the disk names of ALL the copies, the system will continue to ask
for the original disk, and will not run the game.

There are two Hard Disk Installation options to choose from:

Complete Install - will copy the contents of all game disks to your hard disk.
                   Choose Complete Install if you want to install the entire
                   game.

Small Install - will copy only the contents of the STARTUP DISK onto your
                hard disk.  As you play the game, you will be prompted to
                insert other games disks as necessary.  The INSTALL procedure
                will recommend Small Install if you do not have the minimum
                amount of storage space available on your hard disk for the
        entire game.

Installing Your Sierra Game

    1. Boot your system with Workbench, and insert the STARTUP DISK
           into DF0:.

    2. Double-click on the disk icon, then double-click on the INSTALL
       icon.

    3. Follow the on-screen prompts to complete the installation.

    NOTE: If your hard drive is not device DH0:, be sure to change the
    default destination directory to the correct device. For instance, on
    the Amiga 3000, the default destination directory should be changed
    to WORK.

Loading Instructions

From Diskettes:

Note: You must have two disk drives to play from diskettes!

    1. Insert the Dual Floppy Play Disk (Disk 0) into Df0:

    2. Turn on your system

    3. Insert Game Disk 1 into Df1:. You will be prompted to insert
       additional disks.

From Hard Disk:

    1. Load Workbench and double-click on your hard disk icon.

    2. Double-click on the SIERRA drawer.

    3. Double-click on the Sierra Game drawer.

    4. Double-click on the Sierra Game icon.

Amiga 1000

Loading Instructions Without Hard Disk

    1. Boot your system with Kickstart.

    2. When the Workbench disk appears on-screen, insert the DUAL
       FLOPPY PLAY DISK (Disk 0) in Df0:

    3. Insert Game Disk 1 in Df1:. You will be prompted to insert
       additional disks.

    NOTE: The Dual Floppy Play Disk (Disk 0) must remain in Df0:.

    Note for experienced Amiga users: This game will search all drives
    for game information.  If you have more than two floppy drives
    and/or a RAM disk, you may load additional game disks in these drives
    to save time.


Playing Your Sierra Game

Using a Mouse
To activate the icon bar, move the cursor to the top of the
screen.  To position the on-screen cursor, move the mouse to
the desired position.  To move your character, position the
cursor and click the mouse button.  To execute a command,
click the mouse button (multi-button mouse users, click the
LEFT button).  For more detailed mouse instructions see,
below:

1-Button Mouse
Click = ENTER
[SHIFT-CLICK] to cycle through available cursors.
[CTRL-CLICK] to toggle between WALK and the last active
cursor.

2-Button Mouse
Left-Click = ENTER
Right-Click = Cycle through available cursors.
[CTRL-CLICK] to toggle between WALK and last active cursor.

3-Button Mouse
Left-Click = ENTER
Middle-Click = Toggle between WALK and last active cursor.
Right-Click = Cycle through available cursors.

Using a Keyboard to Play Your Sierra Game
To position the onscreen cursor or move your game character
using a keyboard, press a direction key on the NUMERIC
KEYPAD, or CURSOR KEYS.  To stop your character, press the
same direction key again.  To execute a command, press
[ENTER].
[8] = UP    [2] = DOWN     [6] = LEFT     [4] = RIGHT
[DEL] = Open icon bar
[INS] = Toggle between WALK and last cursor chosen
[5] = Cycle through available cursors.
[ENTER] = enter

Using a Joystick
To position the onscreen cursor using a joystick, move the
stick in the desired direction.  To execute a command, press
the FIRE button.  For more detailed joystick instructions,
see below:

NOTE: With the exception of mouse-only items, all playing
instructions beyond this point are for keyboard.  Mouse or
joystick commands may also be used.  Please reference the
section above for mouse and joystick equivalents to keyboard
commands.

Using Icons and Cursors

At the top of the screen is an icon bar containing several
icons that can be selected to execute the command, choices
available to you.
To open the icon bar, press [ESC] or move the mouse cursor
all the way to the top of you screen.
Some icons will have a menu of choices.  Use the [TAB] key to
move between choices within an icon menu.

The WALK Icon
Choose WALK when you want to move your character from place
to place onscreen.  A walking character will move as far as
the edge of the screen, avoiding obstacles in its path.

          NOTE: In Keyboard and Joystick mode, your
          your character's destination will be assumed
          to be the edge of the screen in the direction
          of movement, and will walk off the screen
          if not stopped.

The LOOK Icon
Choose LOOK when you want to have your character look at
something onscreen.

The SMELL Icon
Choose SMELL when you want to have your character smell
something onscreen.

The TASTE Icon
Choose Taste when you want to have your character taste
something onscreen.

The ACTION Icon
Choose ACTION when you want your character to manipulate an
object.

The TALK Icon
Choose TALK when you want to initiate a conversation between
game characters.

The ITEM Icon
The ITEM icon shows the last inventory item you selected.
Choose ITEM when you want to see or use this item.

The SYSTEM Icon
When you choose the SYSTEM icon, several options will be
displayed; SAVE, RESTORE, QUIT, PLAY, VOLUME, SPEED and
DETAIL.  Choose SAVE when you want to save you game in
progress.  Choose RESTORE to restore a previously saved game.
Choose RESTART to begin the game again.
Choose QUIT to stop playing and return to DOS.

Here are this CURSOR Descriptions.  (MOUSE ONLY!)

The WALK Cursor
Cursor will look like a "walking figure" when chosen.

The LOOK Cursor
Cursor will look like an "eye" when chosen.

The SMELL Cursor
Cursor will look like a "nose" when chosen.

The TASTE Cursor
Cursor will look like a "tongue" when chosen.

The TALK Cursor
Cursor will look like a "talking head" when chosen.

The ACTION Cursor
Cursor will look like a "hand" when chosen.

The following is a more detail explanation of the SYSTEM
icon.

The SPEED lever adjusts the speed of your character's on-
screen movement.  Move lever up for faster, and lever down
for slower.

The VOLUME lever adjusts the sound volume of the game music.
Move lever up for louder, and down for softer.  Using
internal speaker move lever up to toggle the sound on, or
down to toggle the sound off.

The DETAIL lever adjusts the amount of non-essential
animation in the game; if your computer system is running the
game too slowly, you may want to adjust the game detail to
eliminate non-essential animation.  Move lever up for more
detail, and down for less detail.

The HELP icon is for help on learning the function of other
icons in the icon bar.  When in mouse mode the cursor will
turn into a question mark(?).

The INVENTORY Icon
Choose INVENTORY when you want to see and select from the
items you are currently carrying.  Within the Inventory
screen are several options:  ?, LOOK, ACTION, and OK.  Choose
? and click on any menu icon to learn the function of the
icon.  Choose LOOK and click on any inventory item to get a
description of that item.  Choose ACTION and use the ACTION
cursor to use an inventory item to take action on another
inventory item (Example:  putting jewels into a pouch).  To
select an item for use, click on the ARROW icon, then click
on the desired inventory item.  (See INVENTORY OBJECT
Cursors, below.)  Choose OK to leave the Inventory screen and
return to the game.

INVENTORY OBJECT Cursors
Each item in your inventory has a special OBJECT cursor
associated with it.  Each of these cursors looks like the
object it represents.  OBJECT cursors can be used to perform
game actions with your inventory items.

To use an OBJECT cursor in the game, follow the steps below:
     1.  From the game, choose the INVENTORY icon from the
         icon bar, or press the [TAB] key.
     2.  Move the arrow cursor to the inventory item you want
         to use, and press [ENTER].  The cursor will change
         to look like the item you have selected.
     3.  Choose the OK icon.  You will exit the inventory
         inventory screen to the game.
     4.  Move the OBJECT cursor to the place onscreen where
         you want to use the inventory item and press
         [ENTER].

PAUSING YOUR GAME
If you wish to pause your game, select the SYSTEM icon from
the icon bar.  The game will pause until you select PLAY to
resume play.

SAVING YOUR GAME

       IMPORTANT!!  If you're playing from diskettes,
       you must have a separate formatted diskette
       ready before you can save a game.  Since each
       disk can only hold a limited number of games,
       we recommend that you have more than one disk
       formatted, in order to assure adequate space
       for save game storage.

To allow for errors in judgement and creative exploration, we
recommend that you frequently save your game in progress, and
that you save several different games from different points
as you play.  You will always want to save your game before
encountering potentially dangerous situations.  You should
also save your game after you have made significant progress.

You may name your saved games using standard English phrases.
For example, if you are standing on a beach, you might call
your game 'standing on beach', or simply 'beach'.

SINGLE DISKETTE DRIVE SYSTEMS
     1.  Choose the SYSTEM icon (slide lever) from the icon
         bar, then select SAVE.  The Save Game menu will
         appear.
     2.  Select CHANGE DIRECTORY.  Press [CTRL-C] to clear
         the command line, and type a:
     3.  Select OK, and press [ENTER].
     4.  Type the description of your saved game, and press
         [ENTER] to save the game.  When the process is
         complete, you will be prompted to re-insert the game
         diskette.

DOUBLE DISKETTE DRIVE SYSTEMS
     1.  Choose the SYSTEM icon (slide lever) from the icon
         bar, then select SAVE.  The Save Game menu will
         appear.
     2.  You will be prompted to insert your Save Game
         diskette into your primary drive (example: a:).
         Using your [TAB] key, select CHANGE DIRECTORY*.
     3.  Press [CTRL-C] to clear the command line, and type
         the name of your secondary drive (example: b:), and
         the name of the directory* you wish to save to.
     4.  Insert a blank formatted diskette in your secondary
         drive.
     5.  Select OK, and press [ENTER].
     6.  Type the description of your saved game, and press
         [ENTER] to save the game.

HARD DISK USERS

       NOTE:  If you choose to save games to your hard
       disk, we suggest that you create one or more
       save game directories or folders on your hard
       disk.  See your computer's instructions for
       creating directories.

     1.  Choose the SYSTEM icon (slide lever) from the icon
         bar, then select SAVE.  The Save Game menu will
         appear.
     2.  If you wish to save the game to a directory* other
         than the one you are currently playing on, select
         CHANGE DIRECTORY*.  Press [CTRL-C] to clear the
         command line, and type the drive and name of the new
         directory*.
     3.  Select OK and press [ENTER].
     4.  Type the description of your saved game, and press
         [ENTER] to save the game.

RESTORING YOUR GAME
     1.  Choose the SYSTEM icon (slide lever) from the icon
         bar, then select RESTORE.  You will be prompted to
         select the game you wish to restore.  (On a single
         drive system, select CHANGE DIRECTORY.  Press [CTRL-
         C] to clear the command line, and type a:.  Select
         OK and press [ENTER].
     2.  Highlight the desired game and select RESTORE.
     3.  If the game you wish to restore is in a different
         directory, select CHANGE DIRECTORY, the type the
         name of the directory* you wish to restore from.

*The term 'directory' refers to directories, drawers, and
folders.

QUITTING YOUR GAME
To stop playing, choose the SYSTEM icon from the icon bar
(slide lever) and select QUIT.

RESTARTING YOUR GAME
To restart you game at any time during play, choose the
SYSTEM icon (slide lever) from the icon bar and select
RESTART.

MESSAGE WINDOWS
Message windows will appear at various times during the game.
When you have read the message, press [ENTER] to remove the
window and resume play.

     NOTE:  Some message windows are program controlled,
     and cannot be cleared by pressing [ENTER].  These
     windows will clear automatically.

LOOK everywhere.  Thoroughly explore your surroundings.  Open
doors and drawers.  Look closely at all objects you
encounter or you may miss important details.

EXPLORE each area of the game very carefully, and DRAW A MAP
as you progress through the game.  Make a note of each are
you visit, and include information about objects found there
and dangerous areas nearby.  If you miss an area, you may
miss an important clue!

GET objects you think you will need.  You can see inventory
of items on hand by choosing INVENTORY icon at any time, or
by pressing the [TAB] key.

USE the items you have picked up to solve problems in the
game.  Different approaches to a puzzle may bring about a
different outcome.

BE CAREFUL, and remain alert at all times -- disaster may
strike in the most unlikely places!

SAVE YOUR GAME OFTEN, especially when you are about to try
something new or potentially dangerous.  This way, if the
worst should happen, you won't have to start all over again
from the beginning.  Save games at different points, so you
will always be able to return to a desired point in the game.
In effect, this will enable you to travel backward through
time and do things differently if you wish.

DON'T GET DISCOURAGED.  If you come to an obstacle that seems
insurmountable, don't despair.  Spend some time exploring
another area, and come back later.  Every problem in the game
has at least one solution, and some have more than one.
Sometimes solving a problem one way will make it harder to
solve the next, and sometimes it will make it easier.  If you
get stuck, you might try backtracking to an earlier point in
the game, then choosing a different path.  If all else fails,
you can write to us for hints.  You can also buy the SIERRA
GAME HINT BOOK from the dealer who sold you the game, or
order it directly from Sierra On-Line by calling (800) 326-
6654.

BRING ALONG SOME HELP.  You may find it helpful (and fun) to
play the game with a friend.  Two (or more) heads are better
than one at interpreting clues and solving problems.

NEED A HINT?

If you need a hint while playing a Sierra game, try the
following ideas:

     1.  If you have a modem, you can talk to the Sierra
         Bulletin Board through the following number:
                       [phone]
         Our settings are 3000, 1200, or 2400 Baud; 8 Data;
         N Parity; 1 Stop Bit.  Our sysop will be happy to
         help you.

     2.  Many other bulletin boards also provide hints to
         many of our games.
          A.  Compuserve:  Go into the Gamers Forum (GO
              GAMERS) or write E-Mail to 76004, 2143.
          B.  Prodigy:  Write E-Mail to 'HTWS90E', or go to
              the PC Club and enter the adventure games forum
              (Jump: PC CLUB).
          C.  PCLink:  Select PCLink Plus, enter Publisher's
              Connection, select Publishers Forums, then
              Sierra On-Line.  E-Mail may be written to the
              User ID 'SierraOnLi'.
          D.  AppleLink:  Select the KEYWORD option from the
              'Goto' menu, and type:  Sierra.  E-Mail may
              also be written to the User ID 'Sierras'.
          E.  GEnie:  From the main menu select 10 (Games),
              then select 1 (Games Round Table).  Select 1
              (Games Bulletin Board), and type set 22 at the
              '?' prompt.  This will take you into the Sierra
              On-Line area.

For more information on these BBS lines, you can all these
toll-free numbers:
                 Compuserve   [phone]
                 Prodigy      [phone]
                 PCLink       [phone]
                 AppleLink    [phone]
                 GEnie        [phone]

     3.  The magazine Questbuster's Journal is a helpful
         source of many game hints.  For a subscription,
         write to:
         Shay Adams, P.O.Box 5845, Tucson, AZ 85703

     4.  Your local software dealer may carry our hint books,
         or may be willing to order them for you.

     5.  If you are unable to obtain a hint book through a
         dealer, you can order one directly from us.  Call
         [phone] to place your order with a Visa,
         MasterCard or American Express card, or write:
                     Sierra On-Line Inc.
                     Order Department
                     P.O.Box 485
                     Coarsegold, CA 93614

     6.  Call our automated hint line at (900) 370-KLUE to
         receive a hint.  NOTE:  California residents, please
         dial [phone].

THIS SERVICE IS AVAILABLE 24 HOURS A DAY.  THE CHARGES ARE:
75 CENTS FOR THE FIRST MINUTE AND 50 CENTS FOR EACH
ADDITIONAL MINUTE.  IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 YEARS OF AGE, YOU
MUST HAVE A PARENT'S PERMISSION TO CALL.  THE CONTENTS OF ALL
MESSAGE ARE SOLELY THE RESPONSIBILITY OF SIERRA ON-LINE.
HINTS WILL NOT BE GIVEN ON OTHER SIERRA TELEPHONE LINES.

     7.  Write a letter to the Sierra Hint Department,
         P.O.Box 485, Coarsegold, CA 93614

PROBLEM DISK?

TECHNICAL HELP (MS DOS ONLY)
If the game colors seem dull or washed out, please try
adjusting you monitor's brightness, and contrast before
assuming the program disks are faulty.

If you receive any of the following messages while playing
Sierra game:

CRC ERROR: This message means you have a bad disk.  It stands
for Cyclic Redundancy Check, a way to check for errors.

DATA ERROR READING DRIVE A: This message means you have a bad
disk.

INSERT DISK #_: (When you have inserted that disk) means you
may need to create a boot disk.  See BOOT DISK INSTRUCTIONS,
below.

OUT OF HUNK: This message means you may be running RAM-
resident programs such as Windows, Sidekick, and DOS shell,
or other programs that remain resident in your computer's
memory even when you are not using them.  Booting you
computer with a BOOT DISK will solve this problem.  See BOOT
DISK INSTRUCTION, below.

SECTOR NOT FOUND READING DRIVE A: While reading any MS-DOS
game disk means you have a bad disk.  See REPLACING DISKS,
below, for more information.

If, after loading the game, you see only a blank screen:
You may have made incorrect graphic or sound support choices
during the Install procedure.  Rerun the installation, and
choose again.

If, after loading the game, you see only a blank screen with
a mouse pointer:
You may have one of the newer SoundBlaster cards without CMS
chips installed, and you may have selected GameBlaster
support during the Install procedure.  Reinstall, selecting
AdLib support.

        IF YOU ATTEMPT ANY OF THESE SOLUTIONS AND THE
        PROBLEM PERSISTS, CALL SIERRA TECHNICAL
        SUPPORT [phone] FOR ASSISTANCE.

BOOT DISK INSTRUCTIONS
Booting your computer system with a Boot Disk before you play
Sierra game will keep any TSR (Terminate-and-Stay-Resident)
programs from being loaded into memory.
      NOTE:  THE FORMAT COMMAND MUST BE USED WITH CARE
      TO AVOID ERASING ALL STORED INFORMATION ON YOUR
      HARD DISK.  PLEASE FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS BELOW
      EXACTLY.

FORMATTING FROM A HARD DISK

     1.  Insert a blank disk into Drive A:
     2.  At the C: prompt, type: format a:/s [ENTER]

           Note:  If your A: drive is a 5.25" high
           density drive, using a low density disk,
           type: format a:/s/t:40/n:9
           If your A: drive is a 3.5" high density
           drive, using a low density disk, type:
           format a:/s/t:80/n:9

     3.  Follow the DOS prompts.

FORMATTING FROM A DISKETTE DRIVE

     1.  Insert you original DOS system disk in Drive A:
     2.  At the A: prompt, type format a:/s [ENTER]
     3.  When prompted, insert a blank disk into Drive A: and
         Follow the DOS prompts.

NOW YOU WILL NEED TO CREATE A CONFIG.SYS FILE FOR YOUR BOOT
DISK:

     4.  Insert your formatted blank disk into Drive A:.
     5.  Type: a: [ENTER]
     6.  Type: copy con config.sys [ENTER]
     7.  Type: files=20 [ENTER]
     8.  Press the [F6] key, then press [ENTER].
         You should see the message: 1 File(s) copied.

IF YOU ARE USING DOS VERSION 4.00 OR VERSION 4.01, FOLLOW THE
STEPS BELOW TO CREATE AN AUTOEXEC.BAT FILE.  IF YOU ARE USING
A DIFFERENT VERSION OF DOS, GO TO MOUSE DRIVERS, BELOW:

CREATING AN AUTOEXEC.BAT FILE FOR MS-DOS 4.0 AND 4.01
     1.  Type: a: [ENTER].
     2.  Type: copy con autoexec.bat [ENTER].
     3.  Type: set comspec=c:\command.com [ENTER].
     4.  Press the [F6] key, then press [ENTER].

      NOTE:  IF YOUR HARD DISK DOS PARTITION IS GREATER
      THAN 32 MEGABYTES, YOU MUST LOAD THE FILE SHARE.EXE
      ONTO YOUR BOOT DISK.

LOADING SHARE.EXE

     1.  Insert your Boot Disk into Drive A:.
     2.  Type: c: [ENTER].
     3.  Type: cd\ [ENTER].
     4.  Type: copy c:\share.exe a:.
If you get the message FILE NOT FOUND, type: copy
c:\dos\share.exe a: [ENTER].  If this file is still not
found, call Sierra Technical Support at [phone] for
assistance.

MOUSE DRIVERS
If you will be using a mouse to play your Sierra game, you
must copy your mouse driver onto your Boot Disk.  Refer to
your mouse manual for information on how to install your
mouse driver, or call Sierra Technical Support [phone]
for assistance.

AFTER YOU HAVE CREATED A BOOT DISK, YOU MUST REBOOT YOU
COMPUTER WITH THE DISK.  LEAVING THE BOOT DISK IN DRIVE A:,
PRESS [CTRL]-[ALT]-[DEL] AT THE SAME TIME.  YOUR COMPUTER
WILL NOW REBOOT, WITH A: AS THE DEFAULT DRIVE.  TYPE C:
[ENTER] TO CHANGE BACK TO YOUR HARD DISK.  FOLLOW THE
INSTRUCTIONS IN THE MANUAL TO START THE GAME, AND HAVE A
GREAT TIME!

If you have created a Boot Disk and booted your system with
is before playing you Sierra game, and your problem is still
evident, something else is wrong.  Call Sierra Technical
Support at [phone] for assistance.


           Docs for Leisure Suit Larry I (32 Color Enhancement)




                   LOST WAGES After Dark Visitors Guide


Welcome to Beautiful Lost Wages

    where you can ante up and party down.
    You'll find just the right kind of action,
    whether you're here to gamble or gambol!
    You may be a little dazzled when you first arrive,
    so we've got a suggestion or two for starting your
    adventure here in Glitzy Gulch.

WARNING

Experienced adventure-type studs may not need this little walking tour,
so don't read any further if you prefer to score on your own.

Let's start your tour in front of Lefty's, one of our classier drinking
establishments.  CLICK the Eye icon on the sidewalk to Look at it and it
will call your attention to the sign on the pole... you'll want to Look
at that, too.  That taxi sign is your key to transportation in the big
city!  Look at the front of the bar, the window, and the street to get
the big picture.

CLICK the Hand icon on the doormat.  Now let's head on into Lefty's by
clicking the Hand on the front door.  The joint is hopping, as usual!
CLICK the Eye icon on everything: the customers, the bartender, the
jukebox, the painting, and the fan.  CLICK the Hand on the empty barstool
to sit down.  CLICK the Talk icon on any of the customers to see what
they've got to say.  Next, Talk to the bartender.  Here's where you choose
your poison, but for now, go for some of Lefty's famous well-whiskey.
Now, carefully carrying your drink, let's take a look in that mysterious-
looking back room.  CLICK the Walk icon on the doorway at the upper left
corner of the room to get there.

Not much to look at... a table, some barrels piled up in back, and a heap
against the wall.  Look on the table to see what's lying there, then CLICK
the Hand on the rose to pick it up.  You never know when you'll meet some-
body you'll want to impress!  Talk to the drunk lying on the floor.  Wants
to have a drink, does he?  Demonstrate your generosity by giving him your
whiskey.  To do that, open up the Inventory window and CLICK the Pointer
and on the small glass of whiskey to highlight it.  The pointer will
change to a Whiskey Glass.  CLICK the whiskey glass on the drunk to give
it to him.  In return, he'll give you his most prized possession!  Save
the game by clicking on the Controls icon and pressing the Save button.
Name it something like, "In Lefty's Back Room."

Now you're ready to start exploring Lost Wages on your own.  There are
other things to find and do in Lefty's and all over the city.  When
you're ready to head out to other nightspots, just walk outside, and CLICK
the Talk icon on your head.  Be sure to talk to the cabby, he knows where
the action is!  You may need to try things More Than Once to achieve success.
And, hey... enjoy the city!


                        The Palamino Ranch Brochure

Calling all dudes! Come one, come all!

"Where even a tenderfoot can lick every mare on the spread"


Activities


Located in the scenic Lost Wages just 5 miles from the Humongous Tetons,
two miles from the pouting Bodacious Tetons, and just down the road from the
Small-Yet-Pert-Tetons.

Get a long little doggie! At the Palamino Ranch, you kin practice all your
dude ranchin' skills, like:

    Ropin' fillies
    Bareback ridin'
    Cow pokin'
    And every Tuesday, enter our Canyon Yodelin' contest!


Eatin' Out

You'll enjoy real down-home campfire cookin'.  For lunch, cornbread and
chili (and hey, blame it on the cows... that's what we do!)  For dinner,
tuna tacos and hot buns.  And if you like jugs o' Moonshine, our cowgirls
have some of the smoothest you've ever set yer lips on.

For you wimmenfolk, we'll akshully show ya how to make some real frontier
treats!  Just imagine pulling your own taffy under the stars, shuckin'
corn in the barn, churning butter and packin' fudge in yor very own crock.
You'll be pleasin' yer greenhorn in no time flat.


Accommodations

Remember, whether it's a day of horseplay or a Bronco-bustin' weekend,
grease up your saddlebag and give us a call at 1-800-ZIP-DOWN.  We'll
set you up with your own filly, bed roll and chaps.  Before you can say
"Yippie-ay-yay," we'll have you back in the saddle!

Available for Bar-Mitzvahs, Bachelor Parties, Conventions and CEO B-Days.

Hourly rates.

Reins extra; no spurs allowed.


Also visit:

    Carla's Bad Caverns (see the drippin' turgid stalagmites and
    oozing paint pots.  Openings available year 'round!)

    Moaning Glory Acres (where the pussywillow blooms!)

    Old Faceful (Imagine... an eruption every 35 minutes!  Could you
    do better?)


Gettin' to the Palamino Ranch is easier'n pickin off a saddlesore.  Jes'
head on down the Tooney Valley Highway and turn off at Venus's Mound O'
Used Tires and RV Waste Sump.  Take Exit 69 and be sure to pull out when
you come to the sign of the Giant Palamino.  We'll keep a light on for ya!


                   The Lost Wages Mystery Hole Brochure

On your trip to Lost Wages,

Experience the Thrill of a lifetime!  Plumb the depths of the Fabulous

            Lost Wages Mystery Hole

                       "over 5,000,000 serviced"

Nestled in the bush just shooting distance from warm, inviting Beaver Creek,
the bizarre yet strangely satisfying MYSTERY HOLE beckons.

Plunge headfirst into the soothing Backdoor Basin!

Squeeze into the wonderful Mossy Furrow at the end of Skidmark Trail!

Spend 5 minutes in the disorienting Tumbling Tunnel... when you get home,
you'll swear to your friends it took you an hour-and-a-half!

See objects swell to 5 TIMES THEIR ORIGINAL size... Then, just as
mysteriously, wither back again!

You've never seen anything like it!

How did the Mystery Hole come to be?

Nobody's quite sure.

Psychic Investigators have studied the Mystery Hole and left scratching
themselves.  Scientists have probed the Mystery Hole with their instruments
and emerged shaking their heads.

All we know is that everybody who explores the Mystery Hole's secret crevices
wants to come again and again and again!


                           WHOSE WHOM IN AMERICA

                              4 N. Kate Place
                        Salt Lick City, Utah  82110

                       From the desk of Mr. Muhweeny


DEAR MR. LAFFER,

Frankly, I'm puzzled.

I don't understand why you haven't responded to the Fabulous offer we
recently made you!

Let's face it, LAWRENCE.  Men have it rough in today's world.  What with the
so-called "Women's Liberation" movement, it's getting harder and harder.
To find a suitable mate.  Even for fabulouso, studly, sensitive guys like
yourself, LAWRENCE.

But we want you to know that WE appreciate your finer qualities.  After all,
you're in the full flower of your manhood...a young, active 40 years old
(barely out of your teens!).  We know that you've got a solid, established
career as a TRAVELING SOFTWARE SALESMAN and make more than $ N/A a year.
You've resided in one of America's finer neighborhoods, ANYTOWN, for 40
years...long enough to have established a reputation as a ADEQUATE credit
risk.

So why Wouldn't any woman leap at the chance to throw herself on your
strapping, muscular 65" frame?

We'll tell you why.  They Would!  But it's so hard to Meet the kind of woman
you deserve!

That's why we know you'll Jump at the chance to be included in this
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity...an opportunity to have your face and your
vital statistics included in what's sure to be this year's most sought-after
book: WHOSE WHOM IN SINGLE MEN IN THE SOUTHWESTERN UNITED STATES.

Imagine, women all over the country will be receiving this volume of THE
SOUTHWESTERN UNITED STATE"S most eligible bachelors.  And not just any women,
LAWRENCE.  The kind of women we know you like, women with the
MEDIUM HANDFULS you've told us you so love to look at...to touch...to nuzzle!
Single attractive, available women with ANY LENGTH legs, beautiful CLEAN
hair and YES derrieres.

Don't waste another minute, LAWRENCE!  Fill out the form at the bottom of this
page and include your check or money order (or just use your NONE credit
card).  And you'll be on your way to a lifetime of babes!

                    Enthusiastically,

                    Adolph Muhweeny
                    Vice President, Direct Male Dept.

-Skid Row